Balancing Act
Welcome back! We're all learning together so please ask a question, leave a comment or share a tip. You can also subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!
Have you ever felt so convicted about something that you came up with the perfect plan to fix it only to have it blow up in your face? If so, maybe you can relate to this story. To give you a quick background, I’m a work-from-home mom, so I struggle every day to find an acceptable balance between work-time and family-time. It’s not easy; as I’m sure many of you can attest. The boys knock on my office door just as I’m about to take a client call and I send them away wondering how it make them feel. A client calls just as I’m sitting down to read the boys a story and I let it go to voicemail despite a pending deadline.
At the end of the day, I tend to assess my performance. Was I the kind of mom I want to be? Do the boys know they are more important to me than work? Did I meet my deadlines? Are my clients happy with my performance? It can be frustrating and I can be hard on myself, but I love my family and enjoy my work so I continue to juggle. Which is why, when I attended the Tennessee Christian Chamber of Commerce luncheon last week and listened to Louis Upkins talk about his new book, Treat Me Like A Customer, it left me feeling convicted.
Upkins spoke about fulfill our calling as a parent and spouse by treating those closest to us as well as we would treat our customers. His goal in writing the book was to help business people at every level reorder their priorities and bring their lives and families back into balance. I took stock, yet again, of my progress on this front and left feeling guilty about the time my work takes away from my family. As I left the meeting and headed to pick the boys up from school I was inspired to do a better job of turning off my cell phone, closing my laptop and being “present” during the time I spend with my family. Here’s where my plan blows up.
On the drive to the school I planned out the perfect post-school family outing. I would take the boys to this adorable little frozen yogurt shop with exposed brick walls, distressed hardwood floors, bright, happy paint colors and dozens of yogurt flavors alongside every topping a kid could imagine. We’d sit at the black wrought-iron tables and talk about their day, making eye contact, laughing and enjoying each other’s company. No cell phones, no computers and no work. Here’s what actually happened.
Little man was so excited to be out of school he couldn’t sit still. He insisted on running the length of the yogurt shop while the shop owner gave him (and me) disapproving glances. After chasing him, running back and forth from the yogurt machines, to the toppings, to the cash register and finally to the table three times we all sat down with our yogurt. I was sweating but determined to enjoy this time with my boys. Big man took a bite of his yogurt (topped with fruit loops, which I tried to discourage) and declared it disgusting. He wanted new yogurt in a cup by itself with a side order of fruit loops. I wasn’t about to pay twice for the same thing so I got a new cup, picked out the fruit loops and handed it back to him. This was still unacceptable, which naturally led to a lot of crying. Not being one to waste food, Little Man jumped at the opportunity to eat his brother’s leftovers, but Big Man wouldn’t have it. If he wasn’t going to eat it no one was! Our perfect moment turned into a tearful tug-of-war over vanilla yogurt with Fruit Loops. In the end, neither of them ate their ice cream, no one laughed (except maybe the other customers) and our perfect moment was a perfect disaster. Fighting back my own tears, I put the boys in the car and we headed home.
After taking several days to ponder Mr. Upkins speech, our yogurt shop incident and my struggle to find balance between work and family I’ve come to this conclusion. It’s the thought that counts. I made an effort to spend quality time with my boys because they are my priority. I love my family enough to actually worry about how I balance my time and it shows in my choices even when they don’t go as planned. I won’t get it right every time, but I will always care enough to try and I hope that’s what they’ll remember.
[...] to sit still that long is an accomplishment!) To read the rest of that first post I read go here. Her story is fresh, honest, and friendly. She brings us along the paths she’s walking and [...]